Dr.Lata Mani offered me new glasses-sometimes I look through them
It surprises me why for a couple of moments I could not remember anything rather I have memories of me being completely immersed in the discussion. Maybe I can term that discussion almost similar to an experience/incident so overwhelming that mind knows about its occurrence but hardly remembers what it encountered. Strange and complex are the ways by which mind and body function
Consciously rearticulating responses of “mind, body and heart” can lead to building up of new vistas and insights into the unconsidered. Awakening up to a kind of a awareness that will help in understanding and appreciating matter in a fuller sense. But how do you classify a response as conditioned/conscious or unconditioned/natural? It seems that this knowledge comes gradually by itself as awareness about conditioned and natural develops with practice of reconsideration.
Examining a subject with different perspectives reveals a whole new world of interconnected relationships. Lata Mani gave one such example. Our aversion from trash when examined through social, cultural, historical lenses exposes cause and effects at micro and macro levels. This aversion from trash reflects our cultural disdain from body and matter, the belief that value rests in function, our practice of alienation and discrimination by building up our own notions of hierarchy, social prejudice faced by labour class, the way first world treats third world countries .
this way of observing profoundly challenges our sensibilities of” that’s how it is” which is often built without seeking any reason.
Also, observing beauty in the ordinary, in visual as well as ritual sense.
Much more has stayed with me than written here, which hopefully would be triggered and utilised during my project.
Theatre in my mind has been a pre-choreographed array of interactions and always a medium to convey something may be a story, theme or a message for an audience than for self. it amazed me how they could perceive it totally in a new light.
After the exercise that we merged into public, Deepak asked me how i felt, i refused to call the exercise as a form of theatre, now after Jyoti‘s talk I realise what Deepak meant by “every interaction is a theatre practice”. It’s a completely new way to look at how we negotiate the self according to the receiver of information. i think i can relate to the idea of embodied knowledge or how we carry our history in our bodies when i look back to the sculpting exercise, when we had to forget at every other instant who we were and think of ourselves as characters
Another idea that appealed to me was the relation between awareness that you are performing and subconscious notion of your power. How power makes us realise of the self that we desire to project. And thus everyday performance may be termed as a survival tactic.
I do not agree completely with the idea of consuming experience. I think that even though if we “steal” an experience from the space, balancing it by “giving it back” is not possible. How do you make your “giving back” ENOUGH that it really matters to that space? During the switchboard exercise these questions were my prime concern.
Somehow the questions that were spinning in my head during the first week itself are making me dizzy again. I need to answer these before I can start my final project. if only i could frame them …………